Attachment

I've noticed recently that every time I feel that I like someone, that someone will end up liking someone else. I'm kind of like the main character of that movie, Good Luck Chuck, except I don't have to go around fucking people in order for them to find their true love, I just have to like them. It's happened to me so many times now that I am hardly surprised anymore. It still hurts, of course, but I'm not surprised. And when it happens, I just back off. I've tried putting my hand in that cookie jar before and, believe me, it isn't worth the heartache. I used to believe that maybe the person that I like would choose to love me back instead, but that was when I was young and dumb.

Now, I just totally steer clear of her. I'd love nothing more than to spend time with her, even if it's just as friends, but I know that I wouldn't be able to stop myself from wanting more. You see, whenever I'm left to think about it, I just tell myself over and over again. 'If you don't try, you can't lose.'

I've lost too many times. I'm barely standing. Another big one and I'd totally lose it.